Morgan's Journey

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Precious Life

The nurses told me I would one day forget how small she was, they said I would never be able to imagine again that she was that little. But I have not forgotten. I remember how tiny and delicate she was the day she was born. At 2 pounds 5 ounces she was actually big for her gestational age. The palm of her hand was the size of the tip of my pinky. Her wrist was smaller than the width of my finger. Her toes, I can't even describe how tiny they were. How could a toe even exist that small? Her ears were flapped over like an elephant because the cartilage was not strong enough to hold them open. She had beautiful little lips. Her eyes were so big and bulging like they did not fit into her head yet. I could cup her whole body in my one hand. She was the exact size of a beanie baby. Each human's heart is roughly the size of their first, that meant her heart was about the size of a cheerio. But it was beating, and she was strong.

She flailed those little arms around like she was trying to win a wrestling match. The nurses would try to fold her legs up for good posture but she would stretch them out as long as she could as if to show the world how big she really was. She would grip my finger tightly telling me that she would fight. She was amazing, a true miracle from God. It was so humbling to watch her breath and truly know that every breath she was able to take was a gift. The nurses told me I would one day forget how small she was, but I will never forget. I will always remember the living miracle that is my daughter. I will always remember the day God showed me how precious life is. 

Flamingo Fundraiser

Flamingo Flocking Fundraiser!

My family is currently raising money for the March of Dimes walk. March of Dimes is an organization that helps prevent preterm births by research and education. They also provide help to families who have premature babies.

To raise money we are doing Flamingo Flocking! Flocks of Flamingos are being placed at various people's house over the next month and we are asking for a donation to have them removed! It should be very fun!

Here are the stats so far:

Flock One- 

GINGER's House---a very short fly with a landing at AMBER's house---the flamingos took a night's rest and went on their way to KATIE's house

Flock Two-

CATHY's House---this flamingo flock travels far and have landed at ROBIN's house

Total Fund-raised so far: $125 (goal $300)

Fun Flamingo Fast Fact- Adult flamingos are 4.6 feet tall with a wingspan of 5 feet

Check back daily for up to date Flamingo Tracking!!

No sew Breastfeeding or Teething Necklace

 I saw these great breastfeeding necklaces on etsy and really wanted to make my own. The mom wears the necklace and the baby plays with it while breastfeeding (instead of pulling your hair!) It can also be used as a teething toy that the baby can chew while your out and about. The mom wears it and holds the baby while she chews on it, prevents the baby from dropping the toy and putting a dirty toy in her mouth. I tried it out and my daughter loves it!


                                             Here the instructions to make your own!

Here are the supplies you will need: Fabric that is twice the length you want the necklace to be, wooden beads, scissors, hot glue gun and a small piece of elastic.

This project is done with a glue gun because I don't sew! You could sew it but the glue gun worked great and was quick! First, you need to make a nice edge. I took the glue gun and glued down the top to make a seam. You only need to do this on one side of the fabric.

Make the seam on the entire length of the fabric.

Now you want to fold the bottom up and hot glue the top over the bottom. You want to make the fabric into a tube. Make sure you use plenty of glue. You will add the beads into this tube and you don't want them to fall out.

Here is what is will look like when you have it all glued. The ends will be open and it will be a long tube of fabric.

Find the middle of the fabric.

Tie a knot directly in the middle.

Add beads into the tube. You can add as many beads at a time that you want. Mine were small so I put two at a time.

After you add the beads, tie a knot. Continue this to make a pattern. See in the picture, there is the middle knot, then the beads inside the tube, then another knot.

Continue to add beads and tie knots until the necklace is the length and pattern you wish.

To finish, make the elastic into a little loop and glue it into the fabric on one end. On the other end, tie the end of the fabric into a knot.

This is what the finished necklace will look like!

Perfect size for little hands!

My daughter loved it!

The necklace is not intended to go around the baby's neck, only the mommy's! Make sure to supervise your baby while she plays with this great new toy!

My Breastfeeding Journey

When I was pregnant I was on the fence about breastfeeding. I knew it was important and the best thing for my baby. But, I also felt awkward and unsure about it. I planned on taking a breastfeeding class to learn about it and make my decision from there. Well, it turned out there wasn't time to take a class and the decision to breastfeed was made the instant I found out I was having a preemie. I wanted my daughter to have the best chance of survival and that meant a diet of liquid gold.

Since my baby was born so early and was unable to eat, I had to pump the breastmilk for her. I started pumping about 3 hours after she was born. The nurse handed me the pump and told me to start as soon as possible for my best chance at a large milk production. I had no clue how to use the pump! It was so big and intimidating. I was so embarrassed to use it and I felt like a massive cow. The first time I pumped I got just a little colostrum. The nurse showed me how to suck it up in a little syringe so that I wouldn't waste any. She instructed me that "every drop is important."

As my baby lay in her incubator hooked up to IVs and monitors pumping became my main concern. I couldn't take care of my daughter and I had never felt so helpless. Pumping and providing nutrition for her was the only that I could do to help her and I was going to do it full force. I pumped every two hours, even setting alarms at night so I wouldn't miss a pump. Pumping kept me grounded. Because I was feeding my baby, I had to feed myself. Pumping forced me to take care of myself during a time that I was falling apart.

My daughter first started eating when she was about a week old. She at through a tube in her nose that went into her belly. The tube connected to a little syringe that was filled with my breastmilk. She used to get 1 cc of breastmilk every 2 hours. The breastmilk coated her stomach and digestive tract with immunity and prepared her body to learn how to eat.

A few times a day I was allowed to hold my baby. I would hold her skin to skin and as I did this she began to wiggle her head down towards my breast, looking for food. Over a few weeks time she got strong enough to lick and would lick my skin during kangaroo care.

As she got stronger she got ready to try to eat. She had a lot of trouble latching on and after many attempts the lactation consultant asked me to try a nipple shield. The first time I used it was the first time she actually breastfed. It was amazing. She latched on and became so relaxed in my arms as she filled her belly. It was a moment I will never forget.

Because of her prematurity, my daughter was diagnosed with chronic lung disease. She was on high flow oxygen in the NICU and came home on low flow oxygen. This means she had to learn to breastfeed with a nasal cannula in her nose. This was described to me by one of the nurses as trying to breath through your nose, drink through a straw and swallow all at the same time.

As she got better at breastfeeding, she was able to eat on demand and I was summoned to the NICU at all hours to feed her. Some nights I slept on a little cot by her crib so I could feed her at night. The times I wasn't there the staff would bottle feed her. To my surprise I was so upset about this! My son was bottle fed so I have no problem with bottle feeding, but after all the work I had done pumping and teaching my daughter to breastfed now she was going to get a bottle?

Two weeks before her actual due date, my daughter came home from the hospital.She was discharged only breastfeeding, something that only happens with 30% of premature babies. I was so proud of her and all the work she did!

Breastfeeding became our way of making up for lost time. This was my time with my baby, a time that no one else could provide but me. It gave us a chance to bond in ways we couldn't in a hospital setting.

It was so exciting at each doctor appointment to see that she was gaining weight and thriving on the milk that I provided! She gained weight at each appointment without a problem until recently. This past appointment it was noted that she only gained 2 ounces in a month's time. She also started having trouble swallowing and choking while she is eating.

The doctor recommend that I give her thickened liquids to help her swallow and to add calories so she would gain weight. This was hard to hear. It meant pumping and then bottle feeding- double the work. I was unsure if I should even bother. My goal was to breastfeed until she is 12 months corrected (15 months old). But is it worth doing it if I have to only pump?

Looking back at all we have been through and the major accomplishment that it is for her to even be able to breastfeed I decided not to give up. I am currently pumping every two hours and then feeding her on the in between hour. I am lucky I have time to write this post as most of my time is spent with my old friend- Mr. Pumpy!

A swallow study will be scheduled in the near future to see why my baby is choking so much. Depending on the results I will make a decision to how long I will breastfeed for. For now, my goal has been shortened to getting her through the winter. As a preemie, she has almost no immune system and she needs the breastmilk to help her stay healthy during flu season. If we can get through the winter (10 weeks away!) I will then reevaluate and see where I want to go from there.

Overall I feel blessed that I have been able to breastfeed and to provide my baby with the best diet possible. Breastmilk has helped her grow and has given her the immunity to stay healthy and stay out of the hospital. Whatever I need to do for my baby I will do, after all that is what mommies are for.